90 and still going

We went to my husband's uncle's 90th birthday party Saturday. He's an amazing guy. He was in WWII - and once told us about being stationed in the Aleutians and later, fighting to gain control of a beachhead in the Pacific. He was a rancher, and still ran cattle until just a few months ago. His wife passed away about 2 years ago, and he was taking care of himself and his animals all alone. He's not doing too well right now. His bones are brittle, and some of his vertebrae are fractured, and he's in quite a bit of pain. But he keeps on going.

Driving to the party I got weirdly nervous vibes. We were in a new million- dollar homes-2 golf course subdivision. Her house is so perfect. Mine will never be that clean, or that organized or that  "Southern Living" decorated. But normally I am pretty comfortable with my laid- back style and my comfortable, messy home. I got to worrying about my clothing, my weight, my lack of wealth, whether I had anything to talk with these people about, all my shortcomings.  I don't know why I let myself feel intimidated. 

Of course, they were sweet and loving, welcoming and accepting. It was all I'm my head. And Im ok with myself and my style. I wish I weighed less and that my clutter was gone, but I love my home and I'm OK with myself. Mostly.